April 2025

April 1 Special!
Do It Yourself High-End Stereo Audio Phile Reviewing
Become the high-end audio reviewer you've always dreamed of!
Article By Nilhcor R. Nevets

  In high school we had some lame, yet kinda fun little games. One of 'em was this fun book where you added your own parts of a pre-made sentence by having a friend ask you for a noun, verb... whatever. They added your responses into the sentences to complete the page. In the end you came up with something so totally outrageously funny that you almost lost yer lunch.

Well, it's back and comin' straight at cha! With the below article, you too can be a 100% bonafide pro-fessional re-viewer. Welcome to the ranks of the few, the proud, the neurotic (and we know certain reviewers are narcissists). Simply copy these pages, have a friend or you yourself fill in the blanks and you're well on your way to being among the few, the low-lifes, the self-proclaimed professional reviewer like me! Once all the blanks are filled in, VEEOLA, you got yourself a ready-for-prime-time review.

____________________________________________. So that brings us to
  (Add some catchy beginning here with fancy dick-shun-airy words)

this _________ of a unit called the ___________________. Upon first opening the box i noticed
       (adverb)                                (name of audio product)

how _____________ the designer made this unit appear. You could sense how the designer's
     (describe a look)

___________ ideas were implemented into making this a very unique unit. I especially liked the
(state of mind)

__________________________________________.
(adjectives about output device... tube, solid-state, Flux Capacitor, etc.)

After careful setup it was time to see how this unit sings. One of my favorite recordings is

_______________. There's something special about the way this music's ________________
(name of recording)                                                                         (frequency spectrum)

was recorded which makes some systems sound great or go home crying for mommy.

Especially the way the ________________ sounds that really sets this recording apart. Upon
                                      (musical instrument)

careful audition it was easy to tell how the ________________________ really _______ and
                                                          (same product name as used above)           (adverb)

___________. Even my close friend, __________, was astonished! It was only when my
    (adverb)                                         (person)

friend and I turned the volume up did we notice that the soundstages became too _________.
                                                                                                                      (size)

It was as though some kind of ____________ made the stage a bit too _________________.
                                                (lingerie)                                               (erotic description)

It was time to see if this unit could really jam. Reaching into my CD stash I grabbed the most

awesome recording of ____________________. Now this is music to _____ to! In the middle
                                (worst performer or female singer)                  (verb)

of the recording I began to feel _______ which made me want to _______. This may be due to
                                             (feeling)                                       (action)

the ________ quality capacitors used in the power supply. ___________ can this thing _____!
      (height)                                                                      (interjection)                     (verb)

MAN-O-MAN, even my ___________ started to _______ as the music was playing. It was
                                 (name of a pet)               (action)

at this time I realized the music was ________ too ______________. ________________!!!
                                                       (adverb)     (noun ending in "ly").  (Strong interjection)

Well, after a good bit of music it was time to really get things cookin'. So i took out my

favorite recording of ____________ and ___________. Gotta tell ya, this recording
                               (breakfast food)     (cooking utensil)

surely can't be beat. Listening to it, it was as if the ________ of the __________________
                                                                        (adjective)          (breakfast food as above)

was real. In fact it was so (same adjective as above) that we listened to it again. Getting a

good handle on how this unit reproduced music was really easy. Since I regularly attend

live concerts like __________, __________, and __________ my ears have been tuned to the
                          (rock band)  (jazz band)            (orchestra)

real thing. Sometimes it gets depressing after hearing a great concert by _____________,
                                                                                                           (name of band)

then going home and listening to Yoko Ono scream incessantly. Though with this yummy

in my system the music really is _________. So after spending a long time with this piece
                                               (adjective)

I can confidently say it's among one of those few units that makes me feel _________
                                                                                                              (feeling)

and _________. __________________________________________________.
        (feeling)         (add some closing comments that link to your opening comments)

Highly recommend and I rate it in our Recommended Integrants in Class __________.
                                                                                                         (alphabet letter)

I'm buying the review sample!!!

So my friends there you have it. Simply copy this article and off you go to your local "high-end" audio store as an official Enjoy the Music.com Special Assignment reviewer. See, it's not so hard after all! Please feel free to share this with your friends and loved ones. After all, we should all be our own reviewer. Who better knows what we like than ourselves? 

Take care my friends and as always...

Enjoy the music!

 

Nilhcor R. Nevets